The ultimate bohemian chic accessory…

Bohemian – Day 25

Bohemians are well known for not following the rules, but did you know they also don’t even follow simple instructions?  Well, at least this bohemian mom, anyway.  I don’t know what it is, but I hate reading and listening to all instructions.  I feel like instructions are written to try and confuse you – my son got a yo-yo the other day and it had fifteen steps in order to put it together.  Shouldn’t the instructions have just said, “Attach yo-yo string. Enjoy.”

So dark and bitter are my feeling about instructions, that I even now ignore important, safety instructions, as the case was yesterday when we BOUGHT TWENTY THOUSAND BEES.

Bohemian_Bees_Swarm_Queen

The beekeeper’s store did provide detailed instructions as to how to put bees into their new hive without dying a horrible death.  At least I think that’s what the instructions said before I let my son make a paper airplane out of the warning sheet.  I did manage to take a glance at the opening paragraph and it said something like this –

“Welcome to the wonderful world of bees!  The bees that you have purchased today are by no means aggressive, but transferring them into their new home is very stressful to a hive, so please take precautions to ensure the safety of everyone involved.”

First, make sure everyone near the beehive is properly dressed.  Long sleeves, pants and gloves are recommended.

Bohemian_Bee_Augie

Check!

Next, white is the best color to wear when handling bees.  Avoid black stripes or geometric patterns that agitate bees.

Bohemian_Bees_Family

Check!

And finally, dark-colored animals (bears, raccoons and skunks) are the known enemies of bees.  Seeing any dark animal can trigger the attack signal, so please keep all animals, especially dark ones, away from the hive.

Bohemian_Bees_Goat

Check!

It seems as though our new bee friends disregard instructions as much as I do because no matter what we did to unintentionally aggravate them, they just refused to string us.  Five people and twenty thousand bees had just the loveliest afternoon together.  In fact, so kind and generous are these bees, that I even talked them into helping me achieve the ultimate bohemian chic accessory –

Bohemian_Bee_Beard_Style

A beard of bees.  Far more eye-catching that the classic bohemian peasant blouse, warmer than a Stevie Nicks style twirly skirt and much more of an attention getter than feathered earrings – the beard of bees is the “holy grail” of any bohemian wardrobe.  If you can achieve this, you will officially be “Queen Bohemian Bee.”

I just have one question though, how do you get these things off?  I have a parent meeting tonight and I can’t go like this…

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