Therapy for those who suffer from dress-phobia…

Day 9 – A Month of Maxi Dresses…


Once I saw a reality show about people who were afraid of dirt.  And these people were really afraid of dirt, like they would start screaming and crying if they were within spitting distance of a dust ball.  My first thought was, Wow, you should never come to my house.  Dirty children everywhere, half-eaten snacks, dog-hair tumbleweeds and a pig that sleeps next to the dining room table…  I’m not even afraid of dirt and yet my house scares me.

In order to treat these people, a therapist would slowly place small dirty objects on the person’s head for various periods of time.  If the person could stand a dirty Q-tip for ten seconds, then the therapist would add an old slice of cheese and some twigs for another ten seconds, and so on until the person’s head had triumphantly turned into a good-sized compost pile.  The therapist was very kind and in a reassuring voice would say, “Just breathe… You can do this… Okay, I’m about to add an old sock…” Then the dirt-phobic person would start shaking and whimpering as the gold toe came their way.

It was fascinating.


And I couldn’t help think about that show this morning as I was getting dressed… In a dress.  I really winced at the thought of wearing a dress today and as I approached my closet I was filled with a feeling I couldn’t quite describe.  Was it fear?


Maybe I need a therapist to talk me through my dress phobia…

“I know this hard, Holly, but just concentrate on putting one spaghetti strap on at a time.  That a girl…  Okay, I’m about to add the flip flops…”


  • Mary Beth says:

    I am really impressed by your determination – but I am also surprised. Because one, you look GREAT in dresses, and two, you always look so happy in the photos where you are wearing a dress!

    Is this maybe a case of the ‘supposed-to’s or the “not supposed-to’s”? Like maybe you feel like you’re not supposed to wear dresses because you are on a farm full of two- and four-legged animals?

    I have to admit, I had to overcome a huge case of the ‘not-supposed-to’s, to get myself comfortable with a pair of heeled oxford shoes. I longed for those shoes with all my heart, but was worried that the shoes said “sexy dominatrix librarian”. I was heartbroken when they immediately sold out at the store, and I had to stalk them on eBay for a very long time before I got my pair. And what I finally realized is, the shoes don’t say “Sexy dominatrix librarian” at all. They scream it. And that’s okay.

    Wait. What were we talking about, again? Oh yeah. You have to allow yourself to be comfortable wearing your dresses. It’s okay to be pretty, lovely, sexy, crazy, whatever you want to be :)

    I mean, come on, you were a rocker chick for an entire month. You’re tough. A maxi dress is no match for your fierceness :)

    • My Year of Fabulous says:

      Your shoes sound great! Send a picture! I will over come my dress issue. I already feel better about it. I think it will just take me a while. It’s a sea change.

  • harris says:

    my daughter and family invited me last saturday night to catered july 4th (a day late) pool party, with band, etc and a PALATIAL and I DO MEAN palatial estate at the parents of a friend of hers. Believe you me, that is by NO MEANS my life style (both sides of my family are from west virginia—not that there’s anything wrong with that, to quote seifeld) nor my daughter’s and her family. I wasn’t nervous about going, but must admit was about how i would dress. I picked a form fitting spaghetti strapped, cotton knit maxi with side horizontal stripes in bright colors (black, deep pink, deep turquoise and I think light blue and maybe orange) from KMART!!! (it cost me a whopping $9..99). I got a compliment on how I looked AND THE DRESS before I was there even 10 minutes!!!!
    I love those short in front/long in back skirts and dresses (do they have a name?), but I’ve always hated my legs (too heavy for the rest of my thin body, no ankles, fat knees). But here’s a quick story….the last guy I had been seeing was the 1st guy I ever felt comfortable enough with in my 61 years on this planet to share my hatred of my legs with…he looked at me like I had the proverbial 2 heads and then said he couldn’t imagine why on earth i’d hate my legs, he said they are normal legs, not to thin and not too fat, and go perfectly with my body which he wouldn’t change a thing about! well now, even tho we aren’t together any longer, that comment still resonates in my head every time i put on or try on anything that shows my legs…..voila!, my legs are ok!!…and guess what, i bought one of them thar short in front/long in back skirts the other day AND I LOVE IT!!!

  • Vague says:

    I own one dress and its definitely not a maxi dress. I only purchased it because we were invited to a wedding. I think it is the only dress I’ve bought in since we were married 8 years ago. And I probably won’t buy another dress unless we’re invited to another wedding!

    • My Year of Fabulous says:

      I totally did the same thing. Dresses just for extreme events. I would never just think of putting one on and going to the library.

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