Even though I never get sick, it turns out I’m sick. Writing it right now is actually the first time I’ve even admitted it at all. I made the worst mistake ever when you have a sick child in your house —
I did not keep up the regiment.
After I successfully conquered the sore throat that Emmy had given me, I was so cocky and pleased with myself that I stopped taking garlic and Emergen – C. So when Emmy passed her cold onto August and Buck, germs were obviously still wildly flying around our house and I did nothing to combat them. I just let children cough in my face and spent days wiping noses and sleeping next to August while he had a fever. Considering all that, it’s a wonder I only have a little bit of a cold. (Maybe next time there’s an Ebola outbreak, I should volunteer.)
For a couple of days I’ve just felt stuffy and foggy — you know that weird brain fog you feel when you’re sick. I was sitting on the couch zoning out when I remembered that the previous day a chicken had run into our house and hid under the couch. It occurred to me that I had not checked to see if the chicken had ever left the house, so I got up and leaned way over the back of the couch to look underneath it. I was completely upside down and my head just felt like exploding. I thought, Wow, this is the low point of my cold right here. My nose is completely stopped up and I’m upside-down looking for a chicken. Fortunately, there was no chicken there, but just as I was about to return to a sitting position, I heard Buck say, “Mom, your thighs look huge like that!” This made Emmy and Aug look and I could hear them mumble astonished, Wows, as they looked at me upside down in my old sweatpants with my thighs squashed against the couch.
I thought, No, actually this is the low point of my cold.